


definitely not suspicious at all in the least

by presumenothing (justjoy)



Series: atla fics [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: (no fire lords were harmed in the making of this fic), Crack, Gen, Humor, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 07:02:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21442147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justjoy/pseuds/presumenothing
Summary: Toph crosses her arms. “What, you think I can’t buy a stupid mask just because I’m blind?”(or: plausible deniability 101)
Series: atla fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1655797
Comments: 19
Kudos: 708
Collections: The Tales of the World of Avatar





	definitely not suspicious at all in the least

**Author's Note:**

> sometimes you just gotta write atla crack to cope (i know, i'm surprised too)

**i. **

By the time it becomes A Thing, none of them can agree who started it to begin with.

Katara flat out denies it, Sokka and Aang both say they dared the other to do it, and Suki reminds them (to Sokka’s enthusiastic agreement) that she already has the most awesomest outfit and doesn’t need anything else, thank you.

Zuko simply gives them all the flattest stare he can muster.

(Which is when Toph butts in to claim that it was her because she’s an actual agent of chaos so _of course_ she does. They’re all inclined to doubt her somewhat just on principle, and also because the Blue Spirit is – well, _blue_.

Toph crosses her arms. “What, you think I can’t buy a stupid mask just because I’m blind?”

…in all fairness, the Blue Spirit is now far more widely sold than any other theatre mask, much to Zuko’s chagrin.

So it’s not _impossible_ per se, but Sokka coughs something about _Appa_ and _posters _followed by a yelp when he doesn’t dodge the incoming pebble fast enough.

Suki’s pat on his shoulder is not entirely sympathetic.)

* * *

**ii.**

But anyway. However it began, the six of them have somehow become too easily-recognisable in so many places that it’s sometimes horribly difficult and/or downright impossible (like _really **actually**_ impossible) to do things even in an unofficial capacity, without having to go completely incognito.

…for a given meaning of the term, that is.

“No, see, I’m definitely not the Avatar!” exclaims a figure clad in unmistakably Air Nomad robes beneath the mask, who _just as definitely_ doesn’t have two fruit pies balanced on each arm. “Just your friendly neighbourhood Blue Spirit, who’ll be going right now, bye!”

_At least he didn’t fly off in the glider, _Zuko will think later, face firmly buried in his palms.

He steadfastly refuses to meet the eyes of the guard who’d brought him the report with those words written down verbatim. Who also hadn’t tried very hard to stop the Avatar – sorry, the _Blue Spirit_ – from the judicious application of pastry to a visiting minister who overestimated himself in every aspect except his ability to _irretrievably piss off _who so much as breathed in his presence, Blue Spirit or otherwise.

(“Is it possible for me to banish myself for another three years, do you think?” Zuko wonders aloud.

“I’m afraid not, my lord,” comes the carefully-serious answer, and as long as Zuko doesn’t look up he won’t see anyone laughing at his predicament which means that he won’t have to kick them out for insubordination or whatever.

“That’s what I thought,” Zuko sighs gloomily, and heroically resists the temptation to set the report on fire. Maybe this was why Uncle drank so much tea to cope.)

* * *

**iii.**

Of course, none of that really explains how or why Zuko ends up sneaking his way around the perimeter of a stronghold one dark but fortunately-not-stormy night. Everything about this is laughably familiar except for minor differences in layout (impenetrable fortresses – seen one, seen them all) and the fact that he’s not here to break the Avatar out. Though that might’ve been preferable, seeing as he’s _actually _here because rumour says that this stronghold is holding prisoners of war in explicit contravention of the peace treaties, and no matter how much Zuko’s instincts might concur, the Fire Lord can’t just storm in during broad daylight without any shred of evidence to back it up.

Admittedly, the word of an anonymous vigilante is pretty damned flimsy as far as _evidence_ goes, but it’s better than nothing, and he’s already spent far too long probing every other (relatively) more legal avenue to no avail.

Surely Uncle would have some proverb about desperate measures and desperate times if he’d known about this – which he probably does, who is Zuko even kidding.

It’s enough to make anyone nostalgic for the days when he’d had no fixed responsibilities besides being an indiscriminate pain in everyone’s ass, up to and including his own.

_And_ had a better mask too, dammit. Because this one must’ve been made by someone with _no proper consideration_ for the practical necessities of theatre, Zuko concludes as he tugs irritably at the stupidly scratchy straps for the umpteenth time. It had been reasonably priced and he’d bought it in a hurry, yes, but neither of that should excuse _offensively poor build quality._

All said, he’s in quite the foul mood by the time he rounds a corner and runs into the Blue Spirit.

_…another_ Blue Spirit, that is.

Zuko does _not_ groan aloud, because he is a pro at stealth work. But it’s a close call, and it turns out to be moot anyway.

“Aha!” crows the Blue Spirit who is definitely _not_ Sokka trespassing on places he has no business being in, though at least he’s not wearing Water Tribe blue. “I _knew_ you were in on this too!”

“Excuse _you_,” says Zuko instead of trying to deny anything at all, because becoming Fire Lord has made him better at diplomacy but not lying, though even he had to admit that they were occasionally (_very_ occasionally) the same thing.

Also, he _is_ the original Blue Spirit in the most literal sense, so there.

“Will you two boys be _quiet!_” comes the pointed whisper from the outer wall above them, before either of them can continue. “We’re actually working up here!”

_“Suki!?”_ not-Sokka whispers back, visibly starry-eyed even through the mask.

“‘We’?” Zuko repeats, far more cautiously.

“She meant the royal we, I’m sure,” comes a different whisper, and they both look up to see a _third _Blue Spirit who somehow manages to convey deep boredom even through the mask.

Not-Sokka gulps nervously.

(“Why, Suki?” he wails later. “I can’t believe you brought _Mai_ out Blue Spiriting instead of me!”

“I needed knives of the throwing kind,” Suki says calmly as she continues writing the report that will somehow arrive on Zuko’s desk via third party tomorrow, never mind the fact that it’s also being written in his office right now. “And I thought she might like a shot at the Blue Spirit leaderboard that I _know_ you and Aang are keeping track of somewhere.”

“_**I’m going to make tea!**_” Zuko declares far louder than is strictly necessary, which is still not quite enough to cover Suki mouthing _maybe next time_ with a wink at Sokka.

At this rate they’re going to have to create a special incident report form just for Blue Spirit activities and it still won’t be enough.

…he is going to need _so much tea._)

**Author's Note:**

> full credit for the very origins of this idea goes to the nirvana in fire fandom, specifically the amount of hysterical crylaughing i did over the legend of 夏夏
> 
> EDIT: wow this got more attention than i ever expected?? anyway if you liked this fic check out [my other atla fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21416371) too because i think it's worth it /shameless self-plug over


End file.
